Category Archives: Church

Grandad

You’re still here in my dreams,

But I wish you weren’t. 

Seeing that big smile in person was amazing,

No one can compare to you.

The only one who saved me, 

The only one who took an interest.

Mum says I’ll see you again,

I hope I go to heaven too.

It will be 4 years that you have been gone in 10 days,

Please watch over me & help me get through it. 

I love you for eternity, 

Rest in paradise, Grandad 💕

~AshKaay 

Today

“Bipolar disorder is like a thief. 
It steals and never gives back.”

I really feel shitty. My boyfriend goes to work in Zimbabwe for 10 days on Wednesday. I don’t know what I’m going to do without him.

Luckily I see my psychologist on Thursday so it’s not so bad. 

I’m tired constantly and I’m so over it right now. I’ve been good – haven’t been sleeping in the day. But, I think today I deserve a nap! 

I just this second got a whatsapp from my mother in law asking if I want to go pick out a bath & lots of new things for the house we are building on the farm. I can’t turn that down cause I love interior decorating. But there’s always a catch. Lunch with our pastor & his wife!

Any prayers for no panic attacks would be greatly appreciated.

Quick quote:

“He who kneels before God, can stand before anyone.” 

Have a good day,

💕AshKaay 

Born again! 🙏

So, I used to be amazingly dedicated to God & my bible.

But I lost my way over the past couple of years with all the stress & handling the diagnosis. I thought God hated me.

I wouldn’t be here today if it wasn’t for God. He is always working behind the scenes in my life, everyone’s life!

So today after going to church for the past couple of months & watching Christian programmes on the tv. 

I gave my life to the Lord! I am a born again Christian! 🙌

Praise the Lord!

“Never will I leave you, never will I forsake you” Hebrews 13:5

Church

I went to church today. Yes, me. Church. That has over 100 people. I didn’t even feel the need to take a rivotril! I took notes & sang the hymns. 

To be honest I’m quite proud of myself.

I’ve got a killer headache & didn’t sleep very well last night but I feel so alive today. More than I’ve felt in a long time! I think the Holy Spirit is working within me 🙏.

Incase you haven’t heard this today:

  1. You’re beautiful 👸👱
  2. You’re loved 💗
  3. You’re needed 👥
  4. You’re alive for a reason 👣
  5. You’re stronger than you think 💪
  6. You’re going to get through this 🙏
  7. I’m glad you’re still alive 😀
  8. Don’t give up 🌟
  9. Be positive 👍
  10. I care 👯👬

Nap time 😴

💕AshKaay